Brush:  DON'T SKIP THIS ONE.
Spornette 21 is my choice for brushes.  It has nylon bristles that are stiff enough to permeate and separate the tiniest of tangles, but will bend before breaking strands.  It can be used on wet and dry hair and should be used at least two times a day, and always before showering and bedtime.  If you are experiencing tangles, always look to your brush choice first.  The Spornette 21 is my trusted tangle-busting bff.

Shampoo:
Amika Kure.  This is a gentle cleansing, hair softening, ph balancing wizard.  I seriously love it.  

Other contenders: MoroccanOil Repair, Redken Extreme

Conditioner:
Amika Kure.  I love that this conditioner leaves the hair feeling soft and silky, but more importantly leaves behind no films or waxes.  

Other contenders: MoroccanOil Repair, Redken Extreme

Styling:
If you are heat styling, be sure to use a heat protectant and smoother.  My go to is MoroccanOil (regular).  Be careful with styling serums as they can leave films on the hair, which counter-intuitively ALWAYS makes the hair feel more tangly and dry.

Other contenders: Amika Glass Action 

Note on styling products: Build up is the #1 cause of tangles, dryness and matting.  If you are experiencing any of these issues, be sure to use the products above and add a weekly chelator.

Chelator:  
Redken: Clean Maniac Cleansing Cream
95% of all extension issues we see are due to build-up.  Build-up makes the hair feel stiff, dry and tangled.

When hair feels dry, we naturally want to add more moisture - so we pile on more products.  Well water, hard water, sun-tanning sprays, smog and other tiny deposits can compound the issue.  Light coatings turn into films, then films to waxes.  These are always at the root of nesting and tangles.  To avoid this feeling, chelate the hair weekly.

Other contenders: K-Pak Clarifying Shampoo

Note: Chelators are often called clarifiers.  Chelation is NOT the same as shampooing.  Chelators are strong chemical strippers for your hair.  They strip out hard water, waxes, oils, build-up, well water, tanners, color, and more.  For this reason, do not use this product often.  Use when problems arise OR weekly at most.  If a "clarifying" shampoo is listed for daily use, it is not a true chelator.  Make sure you read the labels.